How does motherhood go, what kind of mother did you become?
Motherhood is very pleasant and beautiful, sometimes exhausting öğret She teaches me a lot and I see myself as a student of my children. I'm a dull mother, I'm not too strict prescriptive or distant, I think it's more right to be a mom who likes to have fun and tell stories together.
What do you do with your children, how do you spend time?
One of my children was three and a half years old, the other approached two. Together we watch Sponge Bob, travel, make up stories and fairy tales. Both of them are so different. That sounds interesting to me. Each of the brothers born and raised in the same family comes to this world with their own special colors and elements. But it's good for me to be with them, I'm happy.
How do you make time for yourself, don't you want to run away from time to time?
Of course I want to run away from time to time tabii Every mother knows this feeling, but as soon as we go out this time we miss home. There are also difficulties in being a mother and a writer. Because writing is an art that wants to devote a lot of time and is fed by loneliness. When I start a novel, I write it very intensely. It's not easy to balance them. But for example, I write more at night, I write my novels in owl mode after the kids sleep. In time one finds a balance in his own way.
Would you have predicted that five years ago you would be a woman with two children?
I never guessed, as I never crossed my mind, I was obviously writing celibacy manifestos. I confronted all of this in my Süt Black Milk ”book, and made fun of my prejudices.
Who named your children and why did you choose to name them both?
We chose the names of our children with my wife. We wanted them to have two names, they have names that opened to two worlds. Scheherazade is from the anlat Thousand and One Nights dan, the tale narrator of Eastern culture. Zelda is from the famous American novelist Zelda Fiztgerald. Both names are from literature. Emir is also an Eastern name, inspired by Emir Kusturica. Zahir is both Doğ Az Zahir inden from a story of Borges, both Eastern and Western. Of course, these names also have good meanings.
How did you learn your first pregnancy and share the result with your partner?
I was never ready for my first pregnancy. It shook me very much, changed it, took it like dough, kneaded it, reshaped it. Eyüp welcomed me more calmly than I did, and he always was.
You had a troubled period in your first pregnancy, what kind of process was that?
I didn't have physical difficulties during my first pregnancy, but there were ups and downs because I wasn't spiritually ready. I was always a nomad; I used to carry a bag on my back, shuttling between Arizona and Istanbul. And twenty-six hours flying. Such a person, who has become accustomed to being independent and traveling all his life, cannot adapt to pregnancy immediately. I experienced the main difficulty after pregnancy and had an intense postpartum depression for about eight months.
You immortalized all these tides on paper with Süt Black Milk……
Yeah, I told you all that in Black Milk. It was good for me to write that book, in a sense he healed me. Many women have experienced an emotional concussion after childbirth. We can't really talk about that yet. The important thing is not to forget: We are not alone. It's a season, and thank God it's coming and going.
When your first baby was 17 months old, did you conceive your second baby, was it a conscious pregnancy?
Yeah, it was a conscious pregnancy.
Why did you want to have a second child so early?
I wanted to have a brother. When the depression disappeared, I became a completely different person. I felt very ready to give birth again. I didn't want to open up.
Was your wife surprised when she heard the second baby news?
He was delighted. Gene greeted me calmly and supported me.
So, your second pregnancy, and how was it after, was it troublesome?
It was comfortable. And then the post was extremely comfortable. We had more experience this time. We had experienced what would happen to us.
How did you have your first and second births?
Both were caesarean section. I know there is much debate about this, but I think it is very important that one trusts his doctor doktor I had a doctor who I trusted very much in my heart and mind. He and I made the decisions. Then there was no problem.
Did you panic when you were alone with two children, did you ever walk around?
I'm a quieter person because I've panicked enough during the depression. I filled my panic right. Now I'm much more calm about things and situations and I live like that.
What was the feeling of motherhood, what did it add to you, what made you feel?
Motherhood was a great beauty, literally and briefly.
How did motherhood affect your literary side?
Of course it's reflected in my pen, motherhood, isn't it? But I think his appreciation makes my readers better. Readers who know me in advance make analyzes. So I decide and leave them to comment.
What kind of father was Eyüp Can?
Eyüp Can is a very nice father… A father I look at and say “I wish I had a father like that! Baba.
How long did it take you to get used to your mutual parenting roles?
There's no time for that. People learn to swim in water. We continue to learn every day and every moment.
Are you planning to have another child?
I don't know, whatever I say is empty, it shows life.
Interview: Müge Serçek
Photos: Tuna Yılmaz