My PPD story: Antidepressants worked

My PPD story: Antidepressants worked

We are searching data for your request:

Forums and discussions:
Manuals and reference books:
Data from registers:
Wait the end of the search in all databases.
Upon completion, a link will appear to access the found materials.

"Within a few weeks I started feeling a lot better, like a boulder had been rolled off my chest and I could breathe again."

I dismissed my dark thoughts as normal

After my son was born, I didn't feel very bonded to him. I thought it was because I was exhausted and recovering from a rough delivery, but as the months went on, I still didn't feel attached.

I also noticed that I had a very low threshold for stress and frustration. I spent a lot of time crying. I found myself having a really hard time not getting upset at my son for typical baby things, like when he wouldn't nap.

Every once in a while, bad thoughts would creep into my mind. At first they were relatively mild things, like questioning why we had a child. Then I'd think of something happening to him – we would grieve, but then I'd be free.

But I still told myself this was normal.

Things came to a head when my son caught a cold that turned into pneumonia. He was sick for about three weeks, and during that time none of us slept well. My husband and I were both exhausted and worried about him. My reserves were completely drained, and I felt like I was living on the edge of a cliff all the time.

My son got better, but I didn't. My thoughts kept getting darker and more upsetting, foreign, and wrong.

At the worst times, I imagined harming us both. I thought of scenarios like me and my son sitting in the car with the motor running in our garage. I'd stop myself when I imagined my husband having to find us and deal with that for the rest of his life.

I finally got up the courage to talk to my husband about what I was feeling. It scared him badly. I think his biggest worry was that he didn't recognize that anything was wrong – but it wasn't surprising, considering how hard I had been trying to hide it all.

What helped me when I was depressed

Once my husband knew what I was going through, I was able to tell him what I needed in terms of support. He just kept telling me he was there for me and helped me understand that I had an illness and needed help, just as I would if I were physically sick.

My doctor diagnosed me with postpartum depression [PPD] and referred me to a psychiatrist.

At the first few sessions, I downplayed my situation. Ashamed of my feelings and thoughts, I didn't want to come off as a bad mom. But pretty quickly I realized that I needed to be honest with myself, my partner, and the doctors trying to help me.

I started taking an antidepressant that's safe for breastfeeding, and for a while I saw a therapist, who taught me breathing and meditation techniques. Within a few weeks I started feeling a lot better, like a boulder had been rolled off my chest and I could breathe again – for the first time in months.

My son is 14 months old now, and I love spending time with him. Being a mom has become so much less stressful. Some of that is just time, but it's also because I got help.

I'm still on the antidepressants, but am hoping to start reducing my dose soon, with my doctor's supervision. I still use the relaxation techniques when things get rough, but I feel much less fragile, and very lucky to have such a supportive partner as well as access to good medical care.

What I wish other moms knew

Be honest with yourself and your loved ones. Try to let others know how you're feeling before you hit the point where you can't go on.

Lots of moms have PPD, and none of us are monsters or bad mothers.

My husband said, "You wouldn't judge someone who has cancer. This is the same, but harder to see."

Remember that nothing has to be perfect, so go easy on yourself. Remind yourself that you're doing the best you can to care for your child, and it is good enough.

Read more moms' stories about depression.

At least 1 in 10 new moms suffers from depression. But many women don't get help because they're ashamed of how they feel or brush off signs such as fatigue or irritability as normal.

If you have symptoms of depression, tell your doctor and ask for a referral to a mental health professional. Or contact Postpartum Support International at (800) 944-4773 for free, confidential advice and help finding a therapist or support group in your area.

If you're thinking about harming yourself or your baby and you need to talk to someone right away, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255 for free, confidential support.

Watch the video: what postpartum depression and anxiety are really like. my story (October 2022).

Video, Sitemap-Video, Sitemap-Videos